The Love Legacy

When it comes to marriages that are lasting, I'd say my family is more than blessed. Jon and I will celebrate 24 years of marriage this June. My sister and brother-in-law will have been married 27 years the same month. Our parents will celebrate 53 years of wedded bliss this May. March 7, 2014, my mother and father-in-law celebrated 50 years of marriage. My paternal grandparents were married way more than 50 years and my maternal grandparents were wed for more than 70. We are blessed.

So, what do my ancestors know that the rest of the world doesn't? I'm not entirely sure... maybe just that a marriage vow is worth honoring. No matter what. I can't speak for any marriage, really, but the one I was raised in and the one that I'm committed to myself.

I truly think people give up entirely too easily. When the going gets tough - and IT WILL - the faint-of-heart bail. They don't see any other way. Maybe they have no other example. I'm here to tell you, You CAN make it work! But sometimes it takes a little (okay, a LOT of) work.

Before you get your undies in a wad...I realize there are circumstances where divorce has to be an option - I get that and I can totally get behind and support those that are going through a divorce. I also hope that I'm not coming across as judgmental of those who have taken that route. I just know that for us - Jon and I - it won't be an option. It takes BOTH people in the marriage to want to make it work and to be committed to making it work. If you're in a marriage where that's not the case? Then you deserve to find happiness. I'm pretty certain God wants that FOR you.

My parents don't seem to have to work very hard at their marriage - at least from my vantage point. They have always enjoyed each others' company and also spent a considerable amount of time nurturing not only their marriage relationship, but their individual friendships and the friendships they enjoy with other couples. I love watching them interact with one another and I've learned a lot from my observations. They hug. They kiss. They tease. None of this has ever been hidden from us kids. Love was lived out in our house and it was limitless. If there were any serious arguments, they weren't played out in front of us kids. They speak kindly and lovingly of each other at every opportunity - in the others' presence and behind their back. They are nurturing their legacy of love. This blesses me. This blesses us. This blesses our kids.

I married a most wonderful man - a man I feel was hand-picked for me. He has proven to me over and over again that our relationship means more to him than anything else in this world. He loves me more than I ever dared hope and freaking worlds beyond anything I could ever imagine or know that I deserve. We work at our marriage. We talk, we laugh, we squabble, and we disagree. Hell, we flat out fight sometimes! Then we apologize, hug, forgive, and try to learn from it and MOVE ON. We also agree that the vows we took 24 years ago are FOREVER vows - I like whoever said "Divorce is not an option. You mad? Take your 'tail' in the other room and calm down because we're going to work this sh!+ out!" Jon's passion for our family blesses me every day of our lives.

I hope and pray that Jon and I are adequate examples to our kids of a healthy, happy marriage. I know we've screwed up (and we're totally committed to any financial obligations for therapy...) and we apologize to one another and our kids on the rare (hopefully) occasions that those screw-ups occur. I want to live out and continue this legacy of love for the sake of my children and in honor of the successful marriages that have come before us and have influenced and blessed my family.

Lord, may the lives You've joined in this family continue to bless and honor You. I pray that You continue to bless the ones You've chosen for my children. May they feel Your presence and love as well as the love of family and friends. I am confident that You will bring them together according to Your will and in Your time. Until that time, help my children to be men and a lady with hearts for You. I know that as much as their dad and I love, cherish, and want what's best for them, Your desire and promise to provide "a hope and a future" for them is more than enough comfort for THIS girl right now. Amen.

Happy Anniversary, Larry and Elaine! Your relationship blesses me, my marriage, and the lives of your grandkids. I love you and I feel blessed beyond measure.